Who Is Your Friend?

Recently, I had to end a friendship with someone whom I thought I could trust. I was warned. I was patient. Ultimately, my limits were tested, and I had to end it. One way or another, this reflection will be relatable to us all.

Whether it’s with a male or a female, we must discern who our true friend is. Sadly, we live in a culture that has polarized friendships that value the good of one another. The polarization has turned into a way of backstabbing, jealousy, and betrayal.

The book of Proverbs gives us a look at what true friendship should be and will always be.

True Friends are Loyal and Supportive

Proverbs 17:17 states, "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity". This verse reminds us that it expresses nothing but love during the good and the bad. Something to ponder about our friends is the times they have been there for you. That is an important question to ask when understanding if that person has supported you with love.

Friendship Can Strengthen and Sharpen

Proverbs 27:17 says, "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another".

For men, we need to surround ourselves with a band of brothers who want us to become men of virtue instead of vice. Likewise, women need a squad of sisters to help each woman model Mary, Mother of God, daily with radiance, grace, and humility.

Choose Your Friends Carefully

Proverbs 13:20 advises, "Whoever walks with the wise will become wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm".

The endgame of our lives is to choose those who are willing to build us up, not tear us down. We must ponder who is willing to build us up into the child of God of character and virtue, and not associate ourselves who are willing to destroy our integrity.

Love and Forgiveness

St. Paul reminds us in his letter to the Ephesians, “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ has forgiven you."

Let’s offer compassion and empathy to all that we encounter. We must also be willing to forgive one another.

St. Francis De Sales reminds us to love everyone, “with a deep love based on charity... but form friendships only with those who can share virtuous things with you. The higher the virtues you share and exchange with others, the more perfect your friendships will be.”

Always strive for virtue. Always build up others to walk in the path of Christian perfection. Find those who are willing to value virtue to maintain true friendship.